Parapsychology Journalism: The People, The Theory, The Science, The Skeptics
We all have to make our choices. And every choice we make means that we leave another choice behind. Years ago, I was faced with such a choice with regards to my spiritual development. Do I veer into the world of spirit? Or do I venture into the world of physical life. The world of spirit has its advantages: It is far more interesting. Out of body experiences, developing psychic abilities and channeling all have a powerful draw to them. These abilities bring about a power not available any other way. The ordinary world is left far behind for a side of our reality that can easily be described as spectacular.
But there is a price to taking this path and it is an expensive one. Literally. We live in our bodies and in the physical world and there is no escape from it except death. For as far as we can reach spiritually, we will always have to come back to the bills, the relationships and our health. The trips into the spiritual do not teach us how to deal with negativity, how to pay the bills, maintain our health or stop fighting with the ones we love. Those challenges that await us in the physical world are only accomplished by doing. We have to work in some way to pay the bills, we have to deal with our ego and our partner’s in relationships and we have to get exercise and otherwise do things to stay healthy.
I chose to focus on the physical and let my extraordinary non physical side dim somewhat in the background. My early years left me emotionally scarred and my self confidence shaken and these things had to be healed and re-built inside of me. To venture deeply into the world of spirit under these conditions is to invite nightmares and health problems. Healing always has to come first.
I never really put the spiritual stuff completely aside of course, that isn’t possible. It comes back. It always does. And so I have found myself betwixt and between. Neither fully in the material world nor fully immersed in the spiritual one. It’s an odd place. On the one hand, I find myself drawn to the science of parapsychology and all of the objective information that comes with it, as though that were somehow more valid than personal experiences. And on the other hand, I cannot deny that the spiritually is always calling to me and I must always listen.
I know that grasping at a rational, sane, objective world is a sure sign of a sick mind. It is not the reality of our existence and quite frankly there is no such thing. I sit here, staring at my computer, but also looking out the window at trees and plants and passing clouds knowing that these are alive and conscious, just like I am. The money and security I pursue are mere benchmarks for something deeper that is happening; something beyond the physical life that endures well beyond this mortal body I call myself. The struggle to better my life is a mirror changes to my consciousness; to my ability to affect my environment and make things happen for myself. The wading through of life’s troubles are the playing out of my challenges in simply shining brighter in the universe.
it is a great challenge to see the world and know that I have shaped my piece in it and things happen to me and for me because of my deeper intentions. it is a greater challenge still to see this world that I take for real and decide to see beyond it to what I want it to be, not what I have already created. And isn’t that the whole point of all of it?
It has been slow and it has not been much fun, but slogging through the work of making my physical life successful has been rewarding in a way that pursuit of a more spiritual path never could have been for me. And the funny thing is, paying the mortgage and getting the truck serviced can be spiritual as well. Success in the physical world carries directly over into the spiritual.
This is what I mean when I say betwixt and between. There is no clear dividing line between the spiritual and the physical even though there appears to be one. They are at some level, the same thing and even within our perception of them they are so closely intertwined that the edges between them are at the least blurred and more likely non existent. We don’t see this on the bright light of a summer day in the full sun, but it becomes much more obvious in the deep twilight of a moonless night. The half light fuzzes up the reality that we take for granted and forces us to see something deeper. The state of betwixt and between.